My Greatest Enemy is My Inner Me

This blog will tell the story of an up-and-coming young black man in his 20's

Friday, June 30, 2006

*Public Places Part 3*

First off, I would like to say thank you to all who have followed the story, as I've dragged it out for a week. I had other things to talk about as well as being tagged, so I wanted to handle those options first before going back to this.

Again, for those who would like to read part 1, click here.
those wishing to read part 2, click here.

After I moved to Rockford in 1996, I figured I would never see Hazel Eyes again, unless it was at some 10 year reunion or something. Around 98, I visit Chicago to hang out with my boys I hadn't seen in a couple of years. I get word that my boy Blueprint kept in touch with Hazel Eyes, as a matter of fact they went to each other's proms and they began dating. Did I care? No, not really. It was just kind of weird that my best friend was dating my former girl. Truthfully all of my friends liked her, I was just the one that got her, at least originally. Well Blueprint and Hazel Eyes dated for about a year and a half, and then they broke up. My boy didn't take it too well, so they didn't speak for a couple of years until she called him. At this point they both moved on and began having a "best friend" type of relationship. No more feelings, not even underlying, just friends. Fast forward to 2003.

Blueprint was at my crib, telling me about one of our friends getting married in a few weeks. He was on the phone with Hazel Eyes, as she was going to be a bridesmaid in the wedding. "I'm on the phone with Hazel Eyes right now, you want to talk to her?" Of course, its been like 7 years. So after getting past all of the past, present, and future talk, I ask if I could see her. She was down.

I was looking for my best gear, made sure the hair the faded, and headed to her crib. Damn I'm nervous. It's been 7 years. I wonder if she's fat? I wonder if she is going to look the same? I wonder what she's going to think of me? I pulled up to her crib, and I seen someone outside. Ugh, I hope it ain't her. "You here for Hazel Eyes right? I'll tell her to come out" says her cousin. Whew...

So after waiting a minute of two, and getting sniffed by the dog, she comes out. I swear it felt like 1995 again. She was just as beautiful as ever. Still had those beautiful eyes, and immediately (cuz I'm a guy, lol) I notice THOSE. When we were teenagers, she was tiny, but the over the years she grew into a woman. A perfect combo of TNA. She had breasts, looking just as perky and supple, I think they even winked at me. "Are you going to give me a hug?" she says. HELL Yeah, I'm thinking.

We talk on the porch for a little bit, then she decides that she wants to go out. I suggested that we go down to Navy Pier, and she quickly agreed. Blueprint already informed me that she had a boyfriend for the past few years, but he was living in Florida. I tried to stay off of all topics where he might come up. We get to Navy Pier, and its closed for the night. But since the pier is right off of the lake, I just told her that we should walk alongside the lake to continue our outing. We talked for a long time about things. We were on that lake for a few hours, just talking and reminiscing about the past. It was great. She gave me this feeling that she was just as happy to be with me as I was with her. But time eventually got in the way, and I dropped her back off at home. Why did she have to have a boyfriend, I thought. But oh well, I'll enjoy this "friendship" for what its worth.

We continued to talk for a few weeks, leading up to the wedding. The night before the wedding we were going to go to the movies to see Freddy vs Jason. I called her to confirm the time, but she didn't answer. My impatient ass called another chick that I was interested in and went with her. Hazel Eyes called me back, but I already was on the way to the movies with this other chick. I didn't think it was a big deal. The next day at the wedding, she was little ruffled. "You blew me off!" I felt bad. If I would have just waited like 30 minutes, I could have went to the movies with her. I tried to downplay it, telling her I would make it up to her. That's when I figured out that she still liked me, after all these years.

At the reception, the seating arrangement gods played a joke on me by sitting me one table over from Hazel Eyes' father, The Rev. You want to talk about avoiding eye contact! I think the back of our chairs touched, and he said "I'm sorry". I barely looked up and said "Don't worry about it". I didn't want him to see me. Hazel Eyes had her phone with her and sent me a text message "You know that you're sitting by my father." I replied back with "Yes, and I'm having flashbacks!" I also asked if I could make it up to her by taking her out that night, and she agreed. We went to ESPN Zone. We had a ball, playing games, talking shit, and sipping on a few drinks. Nothing major, but remember I'm not a drinker by no means.

I had a great time, and I didn't want the night to be over yet. I drove back to my crib, hoping she would come in for a little while and not asked to be dropped off at her car. She did in fact, come in. We watched TV for a while, and she layed her head in my lap. Why did she do that? Lil Rob Mack wakes up. And fellas know that when you try to prevent yourself from staying hard, it actually makes you stay hard. I was hoping that she didn't feel it. Well I did, but I didn't. LOL. She eventually layed the other way, dozing off. Again, she was beautiful, and had on an outfit that complemented her body, and I couldn't take it anymore. I had to go for mine. I wasn't going to wake up the next day thinking "what if", so I went for it. I began to kiss her. I was expecting her to tell me to stop, but she didn't. I figure that this would be a one time deal, so I wanted to show her that I wasn't 15 anymore but 24 (LOL still young but knew a few things). I kissed every part of her body, and she loved it. She gave me some wonderful head. We had sex right there on my couch.

So things are good, right? Nope. Remember those text messages? Well her boyfriend figured out some way of having her messages sent to his phone. She should have been more careful, seeing as though they were on the same account. But alas, he found out, they had a falling out but remained together. Why? I'm still trying to figure that out. Me and Hazel Eyes proceeded to have this fling for the next 2 years, with some gaps in between when I started dating my ex Southern Belle. Was it wrong? Yes it was. But I was still in love with Hazel Eyes and I loved every minute we were together. But once I started dating SB, I knew I had to end communication with Hazel Eyes because I was starting out my own thing and I didn't want to mess that up. The first time me and SB had our first break up, I called Hazel Eyes. We went out, had a great time, and had sex. Just like that. Me and SB got back together, but I still kept in contact with Hazel Eyes. She told me that we needed to stop whatever it was we were doing because she was falling for me. It was hard, but I agreed, somewhat.

Around May of last year, Blueprint announced that he was getting married, this was on a Friday night. Saturday morning, I get a call from Hazel Eyes. "You know that your boy is getting married?" I say "Yeah he told me last night." "Hmm...ok bye". Hazel Eyes was mad, but why was she mad at me? I hope she didn't expect me to tell her the news, because her and Blueprint were probably closer than me and him were. I wanted her to hear the news from him. But she was not happy with me withholding the info so she stopped talking to me. I called her around Christmas to make sure things were ok, and we talked for about 10 minutes before I had to head into my 2nd job. I didn't ask for any explanation of why we didn't speak for 6 months.

Now its June of this year, 6 months later after our last conversation (over a year since we've seen each other). I invited her to my play. Why? Because when I used to doubt myself, with looks or overall life (My greatest enemy is my inner me), she always pushed me to think the opposite, so I wanted to thank her and I wanted her to see me doing what I want to do. She was happy that I invited her. She came but didn't stay afterwards. At first I thought she didn't come, but she left me a text message saying that she was proud of me. I called her right back, asking why she didn't stay. "I didn't know you wanted me to, I'm sorry. But what are you doing now? I'm at my cousins house. We can kick it now". I wasn't doing anything that night, but even if I did, I probably would have cancelled those plans to see her. I went over to her cousins house, see her for the first time in a year, and she's still beautiful and thick as ever. We eventually get on the topic of why we stop talking the last time. She confesses that she was looking for a reason to get mad at me, because she was developing some serious feelings although she was still trying to work things out with her boyfriend, which she has finally broken up with for good. She has a *new* boyfriend, but I noticed that she didn't talk very glowing of him. I told her that she was only with him because her parents approved of him, and she just smiled. I must've opened up her mental floodgates."Damn, you know me".

So you ask why we aren't together? Her father , The Rev, still holds me accountable of his daughter losing her "innocence". Truss, it was lost way before me, he just didn't find out until our relationship, and for the record she was the one who had me doing "things". But still, she thinks that he would never approve, and I don't want to stir up the past. Blueprint suggested I go to the church to talk to him, but I never have. So it remains the way it is.

The man in me wanted to see if I still had it, so I kissed her. She kissed back, very passionately. Then she stopped and said "Rob I can't do this, I got a boyfriend now". I said ok. I then ask for some head (oh boy). She rubbed on Lil Rob Mack, thought about it, and said "No I can't." We then leave her cousins house, and she tells me "Ok, I obviously can't trust myself around you, so we can only meet in PUBLIC PLACES ONLY."

Now you all get it ?

So what happens now? I get married, she gets married, we move on, we live happily ever after....... But why do I continue to think about her? Maybe it has to do with her being my "first", maybe it has to do with her having a lot of the qualities I look for in a woman, maybe it has to do with her being so beautiful, maybe all 3 of those. If I can find someone who possesses those key ingredients, I would probably feel the same way about them.

I really hope you all enjoyed, leave any thoughts you may have, because this honestly took a lot out of me to write.

Thanks for reading,
The Divulging Robert Mack

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Tagged by Nsane once again...

Ok, I'm late to the party, but I'm here and Nsane tagged me, so here is my version of the "Freaky Meme"


Oh yeah, not a lot, I would say just a handful of times.

Yeah. When I was 19, I was messing with this 24 year old and we was doing the do in the park in the grass on some Jason's Lyric them mosquitos bit my ass (literally) up...I think I counted about 8 or 9.
And if you count a parking lot, I would say yeah to that too..that was just last year.

Yeah, because the bed was breaking. But that didn't stop the show.

Well she was, and it nearly moved me, but I don't think I did.

Yeah, I'm a lame ass romantic dude. Unless its like 90 out with no a/c in the crib.

Sure, a few times. As soon as that nut was busted, it was like "what the hell you just did?" But that was a few years back. Anyone I've been with since 2004 I would say is no regret at all.

Naw, what did the late great Pac say?
"Momma told me never stop until I buss a nut"

Depends. I'm passionate so I'm never quiet, if so, that means something ain't right.

Come on now...who hasn't?

10. EVER MASTERBATE TO YOUR FRIENDS SIGNIFICANT OTHER? Nah, never been attracted to any of my boy's women. But Blueprint's wife is dope though.

Yeah, one of my regrets.

No, but I want to before its all said and done. I've had chicks tell me that they would be down if I found the other chick, but how the hell am I going to do that? I've had a chance, but one of the chicks moved away. I'm still young though, LOL.

As much as I love porn It's only been once, maybe twice. Most of the women I talk to aren't into porn. Sucks.

Both ways. I thought of an ugly chick to prolong a nut, and in contrast I've thought of a chick with a PHAT ass to stay up.

Umm, first time..refer to part 1 of my "Public Places" story

Hmm....this one involves just myself....When I first was learning how to jag off, I was doing it too hard and my stuff swole up a lil.....I don't know why but I thought if put some icy hot on it...............bad that burned so bad, I was running around the crib yelling for about 10-15 minutes. Luckily, no one was around for that. And I think I've only told that story once or twice, now its on the net for millions to see. LOL. Go figure....

15, again, refer to my part 1 of the "Public Places" story

Hmm, good question. Well Chappelle # 2 just came back today from vacation, and I haven't got Gina yet, but right now I'm good.

Well, the first chick mentioned is always possible unless she finds her a man, the second chick might take some time. Time that I'm not sure I want to give.

Suprinsingly, No. Then again I haven't read Nsane's blog yet.

Well, I don't know. I might not pull her hair hard enough and talk enough shit for her. LOL. That being said..................

There you all go. Enjoy.

Part 3 of "Public Places Only" is tomorrow.

Thank again for reading, you dirty minded peeps! Myself included.

Robert Mack

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

*Public Places Only Part 2*

"Yeah, I get it down - anxiously the public can't wait/ had to have it way before it's release date" -Jay Z

First things first, for those who have not read part one please click HERE before going any further. For the others, you may read on......

We last left off with the not quite 16 year old Rob Mack, standing in line getting an Extra Value Meal, when I get a tap on my shoulder.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

I wasn't exactly 100% sure who it was, but I definitely had an inkling on who this guy was. It was Hazel Eyes' father, The Reverend.

"You can go ahead and get your food, I'll wait right here"

Dayum. I thought about making a run for it, but it was just delay the inevitable. So I ordered my Quarter Pounder meal, reluctantly turned back towards The Rev and I directed him towards an open table.

The Rev: Do you know who I am
RM: I think so
The Rev: I'm Hazel Eyes father. Do you know why I'm here?
RM: No, not at all.
The Rev: Well I've been watching you and my daughter for while now, I know that you walk her home and sometimes I see you all hugged up. Are you all dating?
RM: No, we're just friends.
The Rev: Have you ever slept with my daughter?
RM (terrified): No sir!, never!

*Now lets stop the story for a minute. You gotta understand the situation. I'm 15 years old, never been approached by a parent, a Reverend for that matter, and I was thinking about that one episode of The Cosby Show, you know the one where Cliff took the apples and put them on top of each other and asked Vanessa's boyfriend if that was how he was with her. So yeah I lied, for fear of my life. LOL *

The Rev: Ok, well you seem like a good guy, but Hazel Eyes is too young to be dating anyone, and you all are too close so I'm going to ask that you lay off of her right now. Maybe in the future, but not right now.
RM: Yes sir, I understand.

McDonalds never tasted so bad in my life.

This was about an hour after school, so after the meeting, I head to the bus. Suprisingly, I seen my boy Big One get on the bus as well. I call him to the back.

RM: Man guess what? Hazel Eyes' father just had a talk with me in McDonalds..
Big One: What? So what yall talk about?
RM: Man he said would see me walk her home, and he asked if we was together and he even asked if we had sex?
Big One: What? So what did you say?
RM: I told him no about everything
Big One: But I thought yall did....
RM: Yeah but I couldn't tell him!
Big One: So what are yall gonna do?
RM: I have no idea...

That night was extremely long. I was trying to come up with ways for us to see each other, I'm wondering what's going on with her end, but I could not call. Hazel Eyes wasn't allowed any phone calls from boys. So I didn't sleep at all that night.

The next day, I went around looking for her everywhere. I could not find her. We had gym class together, so I calmed myself down, knowing that I would see her in. It took forever it seemed, but she finally came. She immediately came up to me. "We need to talk.."

H: I know that my father asked you about us yesterday.
RM: Yeah he did, he even asked if we had sex. I told him no.
H: Well I told him everything.
RM (startled): Everything???
H: Everything.
RM: So what did he say?
H: Well after he and my mom stopped crying, he told me that I could never see you again, so we're going to have to break up. She walked away and went with her friends and continued on in gym class.

When she said that, I could feel my heart sink into my stomach. It was one of the worst feelings of my life. I wanted to cry right there, but I couldn't because it was school and you can't let nobody see you crying. But this shit hurts. Big One, who was also in the gym class, was there so I immediately told him what happened. Luckily, it was a half-day, so I didn't have to go thru school until 3:00 with this feeling. My boy Playmaker gave me some Scarface to listen to on the way home. "He'll get you thru it". I don't think I even attempted to listen to that CD.

Since it was a half-day, the CTA bus was not crowded. So I was able to get on, go straight to the back row with no one else around, and I just let the tears stream down. Yeah the boy was hurt. Hazel Eyes meant a lot to me, and just to have it taken away like that just wasn't right. Big One called me later that night, and in his words, "I just wanted to make sure you was ok". Now keep in mind we're all 15 and 16 year olds, so for him to call me like that meant a lot, and that's one of the major reasons he's my boy for life.

Once word got around that me and Hazel Eyes broke up, dudes came out of the woodwork! It was crazy. I never realized how many people liked her until I saw the swarm o' fellas that infested her. Even some of my boys liked her (More on that later....) I was still able to get in a kiss or two after all of this, but it was never the same. The school year was over. I ended up going to Dallas for the summer, and I didn't speak to Hazel Eyes once during that span.

September rolls around, and I still had strong feelings for Hazel Eyes. I acted as though everything was cool, so it was back to the hugging and occasional kiss or two. I was going to convince her to be with me again, and just be more secretive about how we go about things. I wrote her a letter stating my case. She wrote me back, and I'll never forget the first line:

"I don't want to sound mean, but there is no longer an 'us'. I still care about you, but we didn't stay in touch over the summer, and you can't expect us to still be the same after not talking for a couple of months. From this day on it cannot be hugs and kisses, just handshakes."


Just like that, it was done. And to make matters worse, she started dating this guy named El, who was after her hard while we were together. She even told me one time that he snuck in a kiss on her lips while we were dating, which I later found out was some frenchin' involved with said kiss. I was hurt and I was mad. And at the tender age of 16, that's where I first realized that I hold grudges, because I didn't speak to Hazel Eyes none for the rest of that year. And remember this new relationship of hers started in the beginning of the school year, September, so I went the entire school year without talking to her. I think eventually in late May I might have finally said hello.

After that junior year in 1996 , that summer I ended up moving to Rockford for my senior year, so I never seen Hazel Eyes again.

That is until 2003.

It continues......

The Finale will be Friday......

Thanks for reading as always,

Robert Mack

Monday, June 26, 2006

Ex Marks the Spot

The weekend isn't already over is it?

It seems like just a few hours ago I was leaving my 2nd job anticipating the meeting of a special friend, but there was a break down in communication, it wasn't my fault, but oh well, let's move to Saturday.

(Oh please note that I've postponed the "Public Places" story for a day or two.)

Yes! This was my first weekend off where I didn't have any acting biz, family coming by, or required appearances of Mr. Rob Mack (speaking in 3rd person, LOL) . I knew that sometime before the weekend was over, I needed to wash clothes. I'm down to the last. I'm down to the tighty-whiteys and batman draws. LOL. Just playing, I haven't worn those since being a shorty, BUT the boy is down to his last everything, so I knew it was important to get to the landromat. But its Saturday, and I'm off, let's enjoy the landscape of the lake and call some females for a Saturday night encounter. Back to Friday night, I called Gina but it sounded like it was a baby in the background that was giving her a rough go at it, so she said she would call me back. She never did. I believe that she was going to Six Flags on Saturday so I gave her a reprieve on not getting back to me that day.

One of my prior flings, I think I called her Aurora in the past, was having a Birthday party on Saturday night. I called her Aurora because that is the suburb that she lives in, which is an hour away if there is little or no traffic, which is damn near impossible in Chicago. So on average it would take me 75-90 good minutes to get to her house. I slept next to her about 8 or 9 times without nothing ever going down. That's never happened before, and hasn't happened since. I call it the Desert Dick Debacle of 2005 (DDD'05). The situation was a head scratcher, it was like her whole family, including her 8 year old daughter (see parents, I WOULD date a female with a child. I just have preferences, that all) liked me a lot, and told her how good of a guy I was. Well I dated her for about 2 months, and after the 9th night of blue balls I couldn't take it no more and quit calling. She claims it had nothing to do with me, it was her and some emotional issues. But anyways, we're still cordial to each other, and she was having a party Saturday night and I was actually looking forward to it because it gave me an opportunity to be out and about instead of holed up in the crib. I'm not a club-goer, though. I hate the idea of seeing chicks that are half dressed yet want to know why you're looking at them, or chicks looking for some baller with his Range on 24's sitting in front of club, vying for his attention. But this night I put all of my quirks to the side and went out. And it was nice, to be honest. Aurora had a packed house at the club, and it made me feel kinda good because it was her party and people were in her face all night, yet she would periodically check to see what I'm doing, seeing as though I was a 1 man crew that night. Party on.

Towards the end of the night, somebody's MILF took a liking to me. I call her that because she looked older, mid to late 30's. My boy Blueprint's wife is best friends with Aurora (Blueprint had to work so he was absent), so she noticed the MILF all up on me. She egged me on to talk to her. Hey I figured it was nothing to lose, so I bought her a beer and we talked for a minute. Her name is Cheryl. Lives out in the SW suburbs. Pretty chocolate skin, tallish and skinny. I walked her and her friend out to their car, and asked for her number and she gave it to me right away. Wow I think history was made here. I've never copped a number from a chick before at the club. Now yeah you might think "whoop-de-doo", but remember that I go to clubs about as often as The World Cup. Once every 4 years, LOL. Not that bad, but you get the idea. So I got a MILF on the team, maybe.

SUNDAY MORNING, actually just a few hours after the club (so I'm running on fumes after just a couple of hours of sleep) I had the opportunity AND and pleasure to meet Dynasty, who was in town for a hot second. Wow, breathtaking. That was my thought. She is a certified DIMEPIECE. Beauty, Brains and Body. (Fellas you should see the...hmm never mind. LOL) And she's got personality for days. I don't know what's the deal with the Bostonian Brothas, but they're letting a good one go by the wayside. I even told her "You look like a ball-players' wife for real" LOL. If Dynasty ever decided to move back to Chicago, needless to say I'll give her a ring. or two. or three. or four or five or....................

After making it back to the crib, all I want to do at this point is get some rest. I'm tired as hell, BUT I want to see this movie that I'm supposed to be in called The Lake House, with Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves. I want to see it early as possible, so I can attempt to wash these clothes that has grown into a mountain in my room. Ok, this is a chick flick, so I need to see this with a member of the opposite sex. But who can I call?

Gina? I called her but she didn't answer. I left a message

Dynasty? She's thousands of feet in the air headed back to Bean-town....

Cheryl the MILF? Naw I ain't trying to call her yet, besides you can't do movies as the first date?

Virgin Girl? She would probably love to, but I ain't trying to go way out to the surburbs and I didn't feel like dealing with her nerdy self.

So I make a call. A wrong call, but a call to my ex. No, not Hazel Eyes, but my most recent ex, Southern Belle. I call her that because she is from Kentucky and has a definite country accent. I haven't spoken about her much, because she WAS in the rear view mirror of my life. We ended for good on not such amicable terms back in December, and throughout all of that I still called her about 2 months later to see she was ok. She told me she had a new boyfriend, and that was something I needed to hear so that I could move on. Me and her had a funny relationship, we argued all of time, broke up on countless occasions yet we really cared about each other, I could probably say that I loved her. But the bottom line is that we're 2 different people that can't co-exist, so being friends in the only option at this point. I hadn't spoken to her in about 4 months, when she called me to ask about some income tax help. Coincidently, that was around the same time that I was dating a chick that lived literally 3 blocks from her. But why did I call her? Well for one, I wanted to see this movie, two my main chick was MIA, and 3 I've wanted to see her since I invited her to the play last week and she couldn't make it. In the play, I get into a heated argument with my girlfriend and I eventually kick her out, and I can't help but to think that me and Southern Belle's prior yelling matches helped me in my thespian studies. She was the first girl that I've ever argued with like that, because normally I'm a mild mannered guy, really laid back, but she used to hit all of my buttons. She told me once before that she's been known to do that people. I'll say. So again, I knew that I shouldn't have called, but I did. It went straight to VM. I left a message.

About an hour later (after finally drifting off), she calls back. I get straight to the point.

RM: Please tell me you got a boyfriend....
SB: Why is that?
RM: Because I wanted to see you and take you to this movie that I'm in and I need you to tell me you got a man so I can be like "cool" and move on....
SB, laughing: I can't say that I do.

So after we talk about current events, I headed to her crib to catch up some more. I tried to sleep (see the theme) but she is a motormouth and wanted to tell me about all of the things she doing in her life now. New phone this, new workout plan that. We then head to the movie. About 45 minutes into the movie, I see Sandra head into a bar. I tap Southern Belle on the shoulder "Hey I think this is the scene I might be in." Sure enough, you see my black, baldheaded (at the time) self walking by as Sandra goes into the bar. And later in movie at the same bar I'm seen talking to some white chick. LOL.......15 seconds of fame, indeed. They completely cut out the July 4 scene, where I was going to be playing a bass drum during the fireworks, which explains why the movie probably took so long to come out. It was filmed in the early part of 2005, but it didn't come out until last Friday. I must say that the movie is very good. Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves are pen pals that fall for each other, except when Sandra writes him, it is 2006, but when Keanu writes her, it is only 2004. Its weird and of course would never be reality, but its a tear jerker with a twist at the end. Fellas trying to get it good with a chick should definately see this movie, and besides you could catch a quick glimpse of the boy! But don't blink twice!!!!!!!!!!!

After the movie, me and Southern Belle head back to her crib. Finally I can get some sleep. As she lays next to me, Lil Rob Mack tries to make an appearance but I'm fighting him off. Besides she says "you can't have any because thats going to bring up old feelings and you know how I am".

And she's absolutely correct.

As I went home last night, (sidenote: Gina called me twice at home, but why did she not call my cell? Just asking...) and as I'm writing now I got this disappointment in myself like "I just regressed". I'm mad at myself for making that call and putting myself in that situation. "But I ain't perfect - nobody walkin this earth surface is/But girlfriend, work with the kid" - Jay Z

I don't know, but for a change me and Southern Belle had a day with no arguing. It felt good. Is this the start of a reconciliation? I don't think so. I highly doubt it, really. Seriously. No more calls. Just friends, right?

Just friends..........

Until next time......

Oh and I still didn't wash after all of that either. Looks like I'm going to have to Lazy Landromat it. What does that mean? That's when you wash about a weeks' worth of clothes to hold you over until you get some more time. Don't act like you ain't never done it before.

Thanks all for Reading,

The Relapsed Robert Mack

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Public Places Only part 1

Before I get to my story, let me get a few things off of my chest. Mack's Mental Musings, if you will. (LOL! What up Missy the Negropino!!!!)

* I know I always have excuses as to why I'm don't blog as much. Well here's another, although it is quite valid: A lot of the work peeps in my dept are on vacation, including ol Chappelle #2. So while they are gone, I have to back up their accounts, which means more work for me, which means less blogging. But I'm going to try to sneak this entry in while it is still early in the morning.

* Congrats to Dwyane Wade and the Miami Heat for winning the NBA Championship. Wade is a fellow Chicagoan and it pains me to see him blow up like this because he should have been playing for the home team, in fact he always says in interviews that he was certain that the Bulls were going to take him at #7 in the 2003 draft, but Pat Riley seen his greatness and stole him at #5. He is a true Chi-towner, in a magazine he mentions that he always has to get some Harolds Chicken, extra mild sauce. My cousin Smooth, whenever he touches down from Dallas, makes it mandatory that we hit up Harolds before we make it home from the airport. What's even more interesting is there are about 50 or so of them scattered throughout the south side (It was one on the west side at one time) and people have their preferences as to which ones to go to.

"Man they don't make them right at the one on 88th and Stony. I only fucks with the one on 71st and Merrill"

"Hey the one on 64th and Cottage always gives you an extra wing"

I remember when I first moved back to the south side in 2001, I used to go to Harold's 3, sometimes 4 times a week. They knew my voice my e'ything. LOL. "Oh Rob, 5 wings, right?" Damn now I'm hungry.

* Smooth just purchased a whip a few weeks before I did, a blazin' red Monte Carlo. He was just telling me that its kinda embarrassing when he gets compliments on it, and the attention that he gets. LOL. It funny how your confidence improves when you're behind something nice. I was telling him that I can look over at chicks and waive - and get this - they waive back. LOL. Don't get me wrong, I ain't in a 06 4-dot Range or "Maybach'n" it, but I ain't no slanger nor was I born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I worked my butt off for what I got, and I love my TB. I just need to get an amp, because it has that crappy ass noise reduction on it so I can't blast music like I wanna.

Ok now to the main story.

My ex-girlfriend came to the play on Friday night. I was mad at first because I didn't see her after the play, but she called me and told me that I did a good job. "Why didn't you stay?" (Pulling a Knockout Zed)...She says "I didn't know you wanted me to. Well what are you doing now? I'm over at my cousin's house." Before the play, I hadn't talked to her in about 6 months, and that was around xmas to make sure she was alive and well. Before that, it was 6 months prior to that convo, so that means that we've spoke about twice in the last year. The reason for the latest animosity was because one of our best friends from high school (my guy who I refer to as Blueprint) was getting married and I didn't tell her. Well I would have rather him tell her since they were best friends, maybe even closer than me and him are. She wasn't too happy with the fact that I held this information in, and she said that hurt her feelings. But she confessed to me the other night that she was looking for a reason to stop talking to me, and that was her out clause. Why did she want to stop talking to me? Because she was falling for me again.

*Flashback story in 5, 4, 3 ,2*

My ex-girlfriend, whom I'll call "Hazel Eyes" (obvious reasons) was the first "pretty" girl to ever give me a chance. She was tiny, barely 5 feet tall and didn't quite hit 1 spin across the scale, but she was carmel complexioned with long hair and hazel eyes. All the guys liked her. Even white dudes had a crush on her. I was a nerd at the time, trying to get "cooler", lol. I was a nerd but I was starting to get that tall dark and handsomeness about myself, so some chicks liked me but only if their friends weren't around. Don't that suck? LOL. But Hazel Eyes was the first that didn't care about my nerdiness. We used to walk the halls hand in hand. I went from a nerd to being popular, just based on the fact that I got this pretty girl to be mine. About a month into the relationship, we decided take it to the next level. Which meant that I was going to get my first piece. I still remember the day, Friday February 17, 1995. It was a half-day at school, so it was the perfect opportunity because her parents were at work. My father worked for Greyhound at the time so he was gone for days at a time anyways. The night before, seeing as though I was a virgin and unsure of what I was headed for, I needed some practice. But who can I ask? I could ask a friend, but I didn't want to seem like I couldn't handle it. So what did I do? I watched Boomerang. Yep, with Eddie Murphy and Robin Givens. I watched their love scene and rewound it a few times, trying to figure out the style and the motions. I know you all are laughing at me as I say this, but this is all fact, besides, what do you expect from a 15 year old? So the day finally came, we took the #53 Pulaski CTA bus to my crib, and upstairs to my father's room (he had the cable tv, and I wanted to set the mood by having BET Video Soul in the background. LOL.) I was nervous. I turned on the TV, and we sat there for a minute, literally. Then she says "Ok, I don't want to watch TV no more". Nervous on the inside, but trying to be cool on the outside, I told her to take off her clothes. Wow I can't believe this is happening. She is naked. LOL. Her tits weren't big (they've blossomed fully now, LOL) but still I had a pretty nekkid girl in the bed. My turn, I get naked, leaving the wife beater on (didn't want her to see the bird chest), then I *attempt* to put on a condom. Them Health ED classes don't help when its real life, and I put in on backwards. LOL. Then I corrected it, except I must've been too abrasive. It tried to put it in, and it broke. "What's wrong?" she says. I was embarrassed. "The condom broke!" It was like the scene out of The Wood....But she was cool. She went to her purse and gave me another. I was sure to put it on right this time. Now that settled, lets dive in! Except I've never done this before. I didn't know where it went. I didn't realized that you don't go into the pussy from the "top", but rather the "bottom". LOL. After she assisted in guiding me in (that's not it, nope, just a lil further down, there you go), I was finally doing it. The phone was ringing, but I wasn't going to answer. Unfortunately, it was my aunt. My great aunt, my 70 year old great aunt who stayed with us. After we were finished, we didn't have much time get her back to the North Side on the CTA. So as we're putting on our clothes, there's a knock at the door.

Uh oh, I aint supposed to be having no girls over. And the door was locked so my great aunt knew that I was home. I go to the door....

Great Aunt: Rob, what are you back here doing?
RM: Umm, sleep.
Great Aunt: No you're not, I would have seen it in your eyes.. You got a girl back here? I was at the neighbors and we seen you come in with a girl.
RM: No, she left.
Great Aunt: Ok, let me see.
RM: I'm telling the truth!
Great Aunt: Ok, well I just want to see....

So of course she comes back to the room and sees Hazel Eyes. Thank goodness we were fully clothed. I felt embarrassed, bad, and mad all at the same time. But my aunt was cool about it. She actually took Hazel Eyes home, and said that she would not tell my father. She told my grandmother, and eventually someone spilled the beans to pops, but it was months or even a year after the fact and I never got in trouble or had a real "talking to" about it.

Me and Hazel Eyes dated for the rest of the sophomore year, but we broke up toward the end. Why? Because she was a preacher's daughter (that old axiom about preachers daughters is true, true, true!) that was not supposed to have any boyfriend, let alone having sex. So one day, as I walked her home from school (she stayed close to the school), I then went to the McDonalds right down the street. As I'm line contemplating what I'm going to order, there's a tap on my shoulder.

"Can I talk to you for a minute?"

It was her father. The Reverend.

Part 2 maybe tomorrow, maybe not until Monday. I wasn't intending to write it like this but this is how it came out. I hope yall enjoyed it.

Thanks all for reading, more to come!!

Robert Mack

Monday, June 19, 2006

2 thumbs up!!!

Damn, is it already over?

That was my feeling Saturday night after the 3rd performance of the play was over. I had a wonderful time. The pics of me on stage are kinda dark, my apologies, I didn't realize that its better to turn off the flash because the light on the stage provides the light.

Me in 7o's fit

Me as Jason with the Dr. and her son. She's jumping in on the XBOX action and proceeds to whup me in Mortal Kombat.

Give it up for the cast

Pops and Me. Still trying to figure out how I grew to be 6'2 and he's only 5'8.

Moms, Me, Lil Brother (Todd Mack), lil Sis, and Dennis (remember when I went to the Bulls/Heat game way back when I first started bloggin? Dennis is the one that was with me. Todd Mack, all of 15, think's he's the flyest and every girl wants him. You know what? He hasn't proven me otherwise. More on him later.

The boy Lil One came thru to support.

Nsane Lee Sane graced me with her presence. Damn fellas she kinda dope. I'm mad cuz Lil One took the pic and didn't get "all" of the amenities, if you catch my drift! LOL

Ok I'll end the pics there, although I have more in the hopper, including Gina, Chappelle #2, and others.

Many Thanks to Nsane Lee Sane and Knockout Zed for coming by. I was kinda mad at the munkee (LOL) because he didn't stay to at least give a pound or a Marlon Wayans handshake (you know with the extra pat on the head and back), but its all good.

I'm tripping on myself because my lil brother Todd Mack might be more clairvoyant than his 27 year old big brother when it comes to picking up on women's interest.....LOL...I'm supposed to be the one showing him how things are. Anyway, he's telling me that a chick in the play named Staci (arguably the baddest chick in the play) is feeling me. I laugh him off, like young boy you don't know what's going on. So the next day after the play is over and everyone is saying their goodbyes, Staci comes over to me while I'm trying to take pics with everyone and she's like "Ok Rob, let's keep in touch." I reply with "Yeah no doubt, I got your number", and then she comes back with "No you don't. You aint never called me before. You aint gonna call me", she says in that daring voice......

I'll call her....maybe.

Gina did come as promised, but it was what she didn't do afterwards that didn't sit too well with me. Let's backtrack. Me and her have talked just about everyday for the last month or so, and we've spent time with each other for the last 3 weekends prior to this last weekend. Well we hadn't really talked that much this past week because she was visiting her mom out of town. She came back on Saturday and came to the show, but when I tried to get her to spend more time she declined because she was tired and wanted to eat and go home to sleep. I'm like "ok, that's the same shit I was on!" I was tired after going to my first job and knocking out a couple of hours, but I wanted to unwind on the long weekend with a drink or two (although I'm not a drinker) and a walk along the beach or something, seeing that it was a beautiful night in the city. Yeah the beach part sounds lame, but that's what I'm into. Anyways I tried to do some cajoling, to no avail. I haven't spoken to her since. She called yesterday, but I haven't returned the call. What do you all think? Am I trippin? That's why I tell anyone who was ready to give her the wifey label to just chill out on that talk. This is a day-2-day evaluation, and I guess she failed one of the tests. But one bad grade out of the bunch can be dropped right? Professor Mack says so. But another low mark might prove costly..........

So now its back to work, and still trying to fill out the summer league roster. LOL. Remember the "summer" technically does not start for another 2 days. Unfortunately the play caused me to miss out on the Puerto Rican Day parade, which is a free festival of fine Boriquas walking and talking. Oh well. Gina is part Dominican and knows a lil spanish, so I guess that's my hispanic fix for now.

As for the acting, this may have been my last production of the year. I have no more vacation days for this year at the 2nd job (1st job I have plenty), so I doubt If I'll find the time to do anything else. But I plan on hitting 2007 harder than something of mine after standing next to

Thanks again all for reading,

Robert Mack

Tuesday, June 13, 2006


That's the best title for today's post....this will be just a recap of the weekend.

FRIDAY NIGHT, midnight, I call Chappelle # 2. Now there have been times in the past that we were to hook up on such late night excursions, and I've called her to no avail. Either she fell asleep or didn't hear the phone or some excuse, leaving me to go home and live vicariously thru Jake Steed and Mr. Marcus and Brian Pumper (and I'm mad at myself for knowing their names. LOL). I can honestly say on this night I was hoping for a no call - no show, but Chappelle #2 must've been drinking coffee or something, because she answered right away.

RM: You still want me to get you?
C#2: Yep, you'll be here in 10 minutes?
RM: Sure thing

SO I pick her up and we head to the South Shore Pad (aka "The Crib"), and I'm thinking like "maybe I could use the sleepy approach and take her home in the morning. Sounds like a plan". So we watch a lil TV, at about 2 or so I'm truly sleepy so I tell her to come and lay in the bed. I turn on the TV in my room (because I'm on of those types that sleeps with the TV on), and hey lookahere - I'm falling off to sleep. I was doing good. Then Lil Rob Mack came outta hiding. He told me "whoa, it's a chick in the bed! It's been like 2 months. I gotsa have that!"....

Well needless to say, he (I) got it.....

It was good, I mean its never bad with her, BUT....It wasn't know grrr-REAT!

Why? Two things come to mind.

1. Out of all of the times me and her have messed around, I've only got head *1* time. And that one time I had to ask and she had to think about it for a second. What kind of BS is that? I mean I aint the type to ask for it on every occasion, but DAYUM hook a brotha up every now and then. And no I wasn't deep sea diving if I wasn't getting nothing in return. Actually I've never went there with her, I was going to one time but she stopped me beforehand, saying that she never liked it. WOW, that's a first. So I'm sitting back thinking like "damn, I'm breaking this chick off and I can't even get it like I want"....I hope Lil Rob Mack is happy, cuz it might be another 2 months buddy!

2. I layed back afterwards thinking that this would have been much better with someone else.........hmm.....maybe I fantasizing about Gina, or maybe not......hmm.........

SATURDAY night, was Tiger's B-day. So we all went out to Dave and Buster's, her and her man and me and.....yep, the aforementioned Gina. Tiger really likes Gina. She told me "I don't care if yall don't work out, we're still going to be friends!" LOL. Gina seems to be well versed at games, or I was just off my square that night because she whipped me in just about every game we played. But wait before I get off of the D and B tip, why are their steaks so damn little? I was like, "Uh I asked for steak, not this hamburger patty!"

Afterwards, it was late and we were all tired. But we when got back to my crib, it was windy. And when its windy in The Windy City , that means that the waves are out creating that unmistakable sound. It sounded so cool. I coaxed Gina into laying down for a couple of hours while the waves were going. She actually stayed thru the night. No, nothing happened. I told yall I'm taking it slow with her, and just let things happen if they do.

For the rest of this week, I'm going to be studying lines and technique for this play. This might be my only entry of the week. The original Jason is still lurking, trying to get a show in. But I got all 3 shows locked. He don't even know all of this lines. But we'll see what happens. Like I say, if anyone is interested in checking this play out and you're in the Chicago area around June 16 and 17, hit the boy up at

Thanks again e'ybody for Reading,

The Thespian Robert Mack

Friday, June 09, 2006


Let the record show that I did blog 3 times this week (NSANE!).....

Here's another instant message session with the aforementioned Chappelle # 2 from yesterday...

C#2 (10:33 AM) - what's up punk?
Robert Mack (10:33 AM) - lol
Robert Mack (10:33 AM) - why i gotta be a punk?
C#2 (10:34 AM) - why not?
C#2(10:34 AM) - lol
Robert Mack(11:31 AM) - what time are u leaving
Robert Mack (11:31 AM) - 330
Robert Mack (11:31 AM) - i see
C#2(11:46 AM) - what r u talking about?
Robert Mack (11:47 AM) - nothing. i just wanted to know what time you were leaving
C#2(11:47 AM) - oh ok
C#2 (1:45 PM) - excuse me?
C#2 (1:45 PM) - hello?
C#2(1:46 PM) - r u there?
Robert Mack (1:46 PM) - what are u talking about
C#2(1:46 PM) - lol
C#2 (1:46 PM) - i'm trying to get your attention
C#2(1:46 PM) - still on for tomorrow?
Lil Rob Mack (1:47 PM) - yeah we're still on.
C#2(1:48 PM) - ok. i'm just making sure.
Lil Rob Mack (1:49 PM) - i would have to pick you up right?
C#2(1:49 PM) - yep
C#2 (2:18 PM) - i just noticed an email from Ricki. Were there any ideas on what our team would be doing?
Robert Mack (2:19 PM) - i had an idea for a crossword puzzle, using the names of the work people
C#2 (2:19 PM) - r u going to put that together?
Robert Mack(2:20 PM) - yeah i was....ill put it together on sunday
C#2 (2:20 PM) - ok.
C#2(3:22 PM) - Ok I'm outta here. Could you please call me tomorrow before you go to (2nd job)?
Lil Rob Mack (3:22 PM) - call you at like 545pm?
C#2(3:23 PM) - yeah


Notice that Lil Rob Mack came in outta nowhere and answered a few questions for me. Now I know how Slish and Slash fight with each other. LOL. I'm hoping something comes up and she can't make it. Trying to avoid getting some ass. Ironic, huh?

My question of the day is, does anyone remember Chester Cheetah Doritos? Simply put, they were Doritos that taste like Cheetos. I remember them circa 1995-96, I was a junior in HS (the year I forgot what school was), and I used to get the 99 cent bag almost every day, and go home and watch the Bulls (this was the record breaking 72-10 year). I asked my fellow peeps and they acted like they didn't know what I was talking about. Just to make sure I wasn't in the twilight zone, and being the internet nerd I am (LOL), I did some research. Wikipedia does have a list of discontinued flavors, and low and behold, it does list Chester Cheese as a flavor. I guess it didn't sell too good, because it wasn't around for too long. But does anybody remember those besides me?

Showtime is one week from today.

Thanks for reading, and have a great weekend,

Robert Mack and
Lil Rob Mack :)

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

What should I do?

Ok, here's a instant message convo with Chappelle # 2 the other day. No editing.

C#2 (4:33 PM) - Hey
Robert Mack(4:33 PM) - hi
C#2(4:33 PM) - you got plans on saturday?
Robert Mack(4:33 PM) - not that i know of...nope...
C#2(4:34 PM) - good, because i have the kind of headache that only one thing can fix
C#2(4:34 PM) - can i plan to see you sometime this weekend?
C#2 (4:34 PM) - oh shit/
C#2(4:34 PM) - damn
C#2 (4:34 PM) - forget it
C#2 (4:34 PM) - fck
Robert Mack (4:34 PM) - what's wrong?
C#2(4:35 PM) - we're supposed to have a little get together saturday night just so the ladies can kick it together before my mom leaves.
C#2(4:36 PM) - shit
C#2(4:36 PM) - i forgot about that
C#2 (4:36 PM) - fck'
Robert Mack (4:36 PM) - thats ok i got fri night after 12 or sunday
C#2 (4:36 PM) - fri night is fine

Ok, here's the scenario. Those that have been reading my blog know that I've had an on again/off again thing with Chappelle #2 for the last 6 or so months....Most recently, it was off. She was the last person I was with, about 2 months ago. (Yeah two months, I'm trippin). But I was calling myself trying to hold out for something new (maybe Gina, maybe someone else.....) however "little Rob Mack" is telling me that he's been locked up for too long. As as matter of fact, it was Lil Rob that gave that answer "friday night after 12"....The Real Robert would have gave it some thought, as I'm giving it thoughts now. I don't know. And it doesn't make matters any better seeing that it may be a while before I can get Gina in that way. Talking to her last night made me see that although I do vibe with her, she is still 21 and I see the "21" in some of her ways. So some of yall can cancel the "Rob's got a girlfriend" talk....but back to the issue here....should I go ahead and lift my 2 month ban with Chappelle # 2, or just hold out?

Thanks for Reading,

Robert Mack and
Lil Rob Mack :)

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Tagged by Nsane Lee Sane

I got a few things on my mind, but I'll start off with the Tag from Nsane.....

1. If you could be doing what you really want to be doing for a living, what would it be?
Acting, big screen or small screen. Personally, I really don't want to be big starlike a Brat Pitt or Tom Cruise, I wouldn't mind being someone like Clifton Powell (Pinky from Next Friday). You know, famous and making money but not constantly having your life scrutinized and being chased by papparazzi....I hate people all in my business...

2. If you could slap the shit out of any famous person, alive or dead, who would it be?
Wow, this is hard, never really thought of slapping the shit outta anyone. Maybe Mike Jones so he can quit sounding like a broken record. (Although his repetitious flows have reluctantly grown on me. Sort of.)

3. What's the dumbest decision you've made in the past 5 years?
Hmm 5 years??? I would say that I should have tried to get into acting sooner. I really didn't give it a try until 2003. But I've wanted to act since I was a freshman in college back in 97.

4. Give up one for a year: (good) sex or (good) music.
That's easy. Music. I listen to sports talk all day, so I don't need music. But good sex, BOY!....Good sex have you going around at work with a hard dick just thinking about it....

5. Dudes, would you rather have a big dick or a great sense of humor?
Ladies, nice tits & azz or common sense?
Hmm, Give me the piece like Lex Steele. Chicks can tell their friends "He aint funny, but he keep my ass climbin walls!"

6. So you've been invited to an all expense paid Blogger Prom in The Bahamas. You're sitting at the bar on the beach. Which blogger do you want to join you for hours of good convo?
Hmmm...too many to name...but the real question is Why are we in the Bahamas and just "talking"? Especially if she got on an orange bikini? (Sorry just visualizing some bad)

7. Which blogger would you most like to cuddle with on the beach? (and don't defer to your current signif other either. Infidelity won't count against you. Duh.)
Hmm, another difficult decision, this is why I could never be on a show like EliminDate, I would be trying to keep them all......Let's see....hmm *pondering*.....I'm not ready to admit my blog crush yet....(heh, heh, heh....)

8. You're going on a 5 hour road trip...which 5 CDs do you bring?
a. Notorious B.I.G. "Ready to Die" (Big's can't beat that)

b. Mary J Blige "What's the 411" (Very Hard decision between that and "Mary")

c. Jay-Z "The Blueprint" (Perfect Combo of Jams plus Lyrical Content)

d. Eminem "Slim Shady LP" (That was back when he was about lyrics. I don't know what the hell he doing now....)

e. Makaveli - "The Don Killuminati: The 7 Day Theory" (I'm not a huge Tupac fan like most, but I love this album from beginning to end)

9. Would you rather bury your children young or have your children bury you young?
That's crazy....I mean I guess the kids can bury me...I don't feel right answering that one...But I want the kids to at least live as long as me...

10. What's your biggest insecurity?
LOL. That's easy. What's the name of my blog????????????

11.What's the first blog you read every day...or however often you read them? (And I swear to God, don't be saying mine just cuz I'm the one asking...unless of course you really mean it. lol)
I check out the boy Knockout Zed every day. He very consistent with his blog, even if its just to write a quick thought (I hate whitey! Thanks, KZ........LOL!!!!) But everyone on my blog list I check out regularly. It's so hard though cuz I do get bogged down at work (and checking out Ebay, lol) so I can go days without checking out my blog or anyone else's. But please let it be known that I look at everyone's blog that leaves a comment for me. I just don't comment because sometimes if I don't have a *cognizant* thought, I'll just read it and keep going. And some people are so popular that they probably wouldn't notice If I commented or not, but I aint trying to say no names (Royce's Daughter) lol...

12. When's the last time you peed your pants?
I didn't pee "in" my pants, but I peed "on" them. I was working at Walmart as a stockman, and I was gathering carts in parking lot, and it was about 11:30 or so. I had to pee really bad and I didn't feel like going in because I had a gang of carts to corral. So since there was no one around, I decided to relieve myself by this tree in the parking lot. But it was kinda after a few seconds I looked down, and let's just say my blue jeans had a greenish tint to them (LOL....)

13. Which was better, your first kiss or your first pay check?
My first paycheck, by far....but as I write this, my first kiss wasn't bad either....good question...but I'm going with the dough..

14. Do you have kids? Naw.....? Want some?? Yeah, 3 or 4 rugrats...all with the same baby momma (wife) If I get married, aint gone be no divorcing shit....

15. You get dropped off at home after the office holiday party by your bitch azz boss that you can't effing exit the car and he peels out, runs a red light at your corner and rolls up an unsuspecting midget. The next day the midget watch groups are on TV outraged at the heartless hit and run, and are calling for any witnesses to please come fwd...that half dead midget has a family at home waiting on C-mas presents. Would you take $1000 hush money? $500? $100? A six pack?
Naw that shit would eat at me for the rest of my life....I would come clean...besides the midget watch groups probably would have a bigger reward.....

16. Live the rest of your life without your eyebrows or your fingernails? People like my thick, dark (but not John Madden-bushy, lol) eyebrows so I would lose the fingernails. That way I aint gotta worry about possibly scratching a chick's walls :)

17. What makes you angry? Females that talk about what a guy drive and how much money he got. Females that don't kiss on the first date. If we feeling each other, what's the wait?? Looking at my bank account was straight until I got the TB. I'll be straight again in about a month....Looking at these actors that turn diva and big time. You know when you hear shit like (insert famous person) requested the room temperature at 72.6 degrees and only green m&m's in a red bowl...What the fuck is that? If I ever make it big, I would be the coolest. I'll make the fan feel like the star.

18. What makes you horny? Money in bank account (gives me confidence).. Reading Nsane's blog when she talks about wet, sloppy..never mind.....Looking at Missy Negropino in her dresses...Chicks that have really wet pussies, I mean dripping. Like whoa, put some of that on me!...Cherokee from Booty Talk....hell a lot of Chicks from Booty Talk and Jake Steed "Freaks Whoes and Flows"....Thinking back on previous chicks that hit me off with some serious head (honestly I would say only 3 or 4 in my lifetime were dope with it. Maybe 5.)...Summertime in Chicago because females are dressing less and looking edible!!!! Is that enough? I can keep

19. What makes you nervous? Thinking I will still be in the same working situation 5 years from now. Thinking I will be like 35 or something and look back like "Why didn't you do that Rob when you were 27, 28,........"

20. What makes you smile? Acting. Driving now (LOL). Wondering if Dynasty's lips are really that soft looking and juicy....Looking at my blog seeing a lot of comments. That feeling of liking someone a lot and finding out that they feel the same way.

Question: Does anybody wear FUBU anymore? What about Karl Kani? I remember 1992 in 8th grade and everybody in the hood was rocking the signature Kani shirt. I wanted one really bad. I was mad because my aunt bought me 2 shirts and shorts but she didnt buy them until the summer, so didn't anyone from my school see me in them. LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anybody seen this commercial yet? Them White boys was doing it, right? They knew the words and e'thing...

Thanks for Reading, one down 2 to go (cuz I said I was going to blog 3 times this week)

Robert Mack

Friday, June 02, 2006

May is OVER!!!!

The title says it all.

I am so happy to get that month over and DONE. With me going to court, "license-gate", getting a new truck, learning roles for 2 plays AND trying to figure out what to do for my birthday was hectic on the boy. All while trying to maintain 2 jobs working 6 days a week. Yep. I am glad to see May in the rearview mirror. I tried to think of a clever title for today's entry, but I just said eff being clever, the title was my first thought when I came on today.

That was how the people at work did my desk. Nice, right? I wasn't even expecting it....Oh, my birthday you ask? I went to the batting cages/miniature golf/go-kart spot with family, and Gina was in tow. We was out there for what seemed like the whole day. Afterwards, I went out to eat with the fam (nope not the Brazilian steakhouse I wanted...) and I was so tired after all of that, I went home and slept the night away...

Now lets stop for a minute.

Was it a night of hijinks, going to a club with the fellas, drinking till my heart's content, meeting some random chick and taking her back to crib to wear her out????? Nope, none of that. But last Saturday was one of the happiest days I've had in a long time. I had a big smile on my face the entire day and night. I'm not sure if I'll ever be the club goer/henny drinker/blunt smoker, but one thing that I'm trying to realize about myself is that I have to be comfortable in my own skin, regardless of what people may think of me. Call me boring, call me "simple" (LOL), but I did what I wanted to do that day, except for the steakhouse. Oh and I didn't get a chance to see "everyone" I wanted to see that weekend, but hey the summer is just starting and I'm sure they'll be plenty of other times. My ship will be stationed in Chi-town for quite a while (LOL). And I got a lot of calls from people, which left me shocked and in awe. I guess a few people DO like me......

Back to Gina. If I must say so, me and her are vibing quite well. She met the fam and fit right in. She kinda reminds me of a petite, pretty female version of me, if there is such a thing.....The other night, we got to my crib and we missed the Heat/Pistons game. She came right in and turned the TV to Sportscenter to find out who won. I just sat back like "wow"......not to mention that she's been helping me go over my lines for this next play, which will be June 16 and 17, if anyone is in the Chi-town area then shoot an email to the boy at and I'll shell out the what, where and when's.....

As far as me and Gina, I'm just taking it day by day. Remember, she is "auditioning" herself. But so far, she's got the role held down. But it's still early. The Director (me) is still searching for a few "understudies".........

I promise (write it down, take a picture) to BLOG more this month. May was just hectic and June looks to be a lot smoother.

Thanks for reading as always,

Robert Mack